A wham, bam $21 wedding ceremony

July 30, 2012

COLUMNS

Gov. Bryant signed the new “quickie” marriage law. As of July 1, you no longer have to wait 72 hours to go running down the aisle. In fact, there’s no waiting period at all. Pay your $21, sign your name and dash off to the justice of the peace. Wham, bam! You’re hitched.

I can see the ads now. Calling all brides in Texas and Louisiana — cross the river, and we’ll have you legal by the end of the day! Liberty dictates this change. As Americans, we know our own minds and don’t need any of that government intervention into our romantic lives.

The caterers and event planners are dancing in the aisles. After all, this is just more money in their pockets. It’s a purely economic decision because we don’t want those wedding dollars staying in those waiting period states. Let’s make it easy for couples to make that trip down the aisle. We’re not thinking of rose petals strewn by sweet little flower girls. We’re thinking of dollar bills coming out of Daddy’s pocket!

While we’re at it, why don’t we become the “quickie” divorce state? The attorneys can line up at the border. We’ll promise divorce cakes and party weekends for the newly single. Hey, if people are going to get divorced ANYWAY, why not rake in some cash from the deal? We could have a destination theme park set up with vendors. Ride the roller coaster of love. Jump on and off and on the marriage merry-go-round. We’ll call the park Splitsville.

Naturally, we’ll want to start a matchmaking service for all the newly single. We could pair them off and send them to the courthouse for a new license. No waiting period!

It could be an endless loop with dollar bills at every turn. Mississippi — the family values state.

Nancy Lottridge Anderson, Ph.D., CFA, is president of New Perspectives Inc. in Ridgeland — (601) 991-3158. She is also an assistant professor of finance at Mississippi College. Her e-mail address is nanderson@newper.com, and her website is www.newper.com.

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